10 weeks - A midwife, bloodwork & A pesky rash

I can't believe we survived the last few weeks you guys, but we did!! Blake is doing much better, though he still isn't 100%. He was supposed to return to work yesterday but his oxygen is still only at 94% consistently. They'd like it above 96. So he has a follow up tomorrow morning. We hope he can return to work next week or soon. We are so grateful that most or all of these 4 weeks off is going to be paid! We will all be so happy when everything is back to normal. Poor Claire started crying today in the car and was telling me how sad she was when Daddy was really sick, it was SOO sad (we drove past Urgent Care on our way to pick up our grocery order and she recognized the building unfortunately 😪)! Poor baby girl. We were all so scared, I'm so glad things turned out well! I hope this sweet girl will forget some of that scary night since she is small. 

I still have not had any bleeding or spotting for like 2 weeks now, yay! But I am so, so tired and so winded, ha ha. And this Round Ligament pain is making it hard to sleep and even walk around. I feel like I look like a hunched over little lady walking around for awhile after I first get up. I do feel like maybe I am getting a little more energy lately, cause my counter top isn't covered in dishes (along with the sink being full) and we've had normal dinners for a few nights now 😂 🤦🏼‍♀️ I am looking forward to some relief in the 2nd trimester. With the twins I went on strict bed rest at 24 weeks, so I feel like I missed out on some of the easier times during pregnancy. But I am just so glad that they stayed safe and were born at 36 weeks and not sooner. Total miracle! As you know, they found out that I had a UTI that night in the ER when checking on baby after the bleeding, so I had to take a dang antibiotic. I hate them and rarely take them (have only had like 2 antibiotics in the last 5 years). It sadly did exactly what I knew it would...it gave me a pesky yeast rash all over my chest, belly and fronts of my legs 😭 I have been trying all the natural stuff I can think of and it isn't helping. So I caved and bought some Monistat cream to apply topically to the rash. Hoping it will help because I am a MISERABLE itching mess. Just glad it isn't something worse, like PUPPS! I hope. That is a total nightmare I've heard. 

I had my first appointment with my new midwife at the birthing center on Tuesday! I was feeling kind of torn on whether I wanted to go with them or this obgyn office right across the street from my house (I could walk there easily if I wanted). But I am so happy that the appointment went so well, I feel 100% great about going with the birthing center! The center was beautiful and I loved all of the staff. Pam was awesome and spent over an hour with me going over everything and answered all of my many, many questions, ha ha. We also did the NIPS (Non Invasive Prenatal Screening) blood work while I was there. It tests for downs syndrome, trisomy, and the gender! We should have the results in 1 to 7 days. I am dying to find out what the baby is so I hope it is sooner rather than later! I mostly did the test for the gender, ha ha, because we are keeping the baby no matter what health issues it may or may not have. With the twins we found out the genders at 20 weeks at the anatomy scan, so to find out at only 11 weeks what the gender is this time around is totally awesome! We have a family guessing game going on and so far we have about double the guesses for a boy. We shall see! Blake is thinking a girl but is still undecided. Claire and I think a girl. Cam currently thinks it is a boy and it likes potato chips just like him 🤣 He has changed his mind a couple of times now though lol. So, we will keep you updated! I am going to make something fun for the twins to open when we find out. I'll share the video on here if I'm able. Sadly you can't upload very big video files on here. I'll upload pictures at the very least. 

The kiddos wanted to take my baby belly picture this week, so here they are! Not bad for 5 year olds, ha ha ❤ Claire's is the closer up one. If the pics look blurry, just click on them and then X out. And I took a pic of just the board also so you can see it better. It is so fun updating this weekly. I'm glad I did it. The baby now has individual toes and fingers, and all of its internal organs have already started forming and will continue to progress. Its little liver is already making bile even! My midwife Pam told me that I will probably feel this baby move earlier than the twins because 2nd time moms know more what to look for. She said she isn't surprised that the round ligament pain started sooner for me this time too 😭

Have a great and safe holiday weekend everyone! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

9 weeks - A board, Bye to Grandma & A checkup

Can't believe I am already 9.5 weeks! So glad things are looking up. Blake is doing so much better, and I have quit spotting/bleeding! 🥳 He was able to shower while standing yesterday (has been needing a chair to sit on before now), can more easily talk and have conversations, and is up and walking around a lot more. It has lessened my stress a lot seeing him out and about. The kids too! They're so happy to see Daddy out of the bedroom. He is all done with his antibiotics and no longer is sweating really badly during the night. I was able to return to my own bed, but sadly couldn't sleep well last night because my brain wouldn't shut off. I unfortunately keep re-running our horrific night at Urgent Care over and over in my head now that I'm not completely exhausted from severe stress. I hope I sleep better tonight!  

I had a check up yesterday at the obgyn's office. She said my bloodwork and ultrasound from last week looked great. My hcg went from 75,000 something to 110,000 something. So not seeing a decrease after all that blood loss that night at Urgent Care is a great sign. And the baby had a nice, strong heart beat on the ultrasound last week. She said she doesn't need to see me for another 4 weeks unless I decide to do the NIPT testing (belly ultrasound to check for prominent nose bone, simple blood work for genetic disorders, etc.), then she'll need me back in 2 weeks. I am still deciding if I want to go to the birthing center in Mesa for a more natural birthing experience this time, or if I want to stick with this obgyn office. I have an appt with the birthing center on the 25th, so I'm hoping I'll have a better idea then. I'm really excited about seeing the center and talking more with them. 

We took my mom to meet my sister today, so she could take her the rest of the way home. I am so glad I am feeling better and was able to drive with no problems. The twins were angels, we didn't stop once on the way there or back! And we ate a lunch picnic in the car when we met my sister and dropped off my mom. I tried to hold it together when we hugged goodbye, and I almost made it, ha ha. So unbelievably grateful for my awesome, loving, helpful, and always willing to drop everything Momma!! I am so glad she didn't catch our crud, so glad. And so glad that she stayed for 2 whole weeks. I really, really needed the help. And the kids had a blast with her as always! I seriously have the BEST parents ever! We are so grateful to all the other family members, friends and coworkers who have sent happy and healing thoughts, messages, and cards. I am so, so happy that I still have a husband and little baby on the way! 

I finally got a baby belly board! I took ideas that I found online to make the board what I wanted. The kids think it is fun and were very sad they couldn't draw all over it, ha ha. It'll be fun to update this weekly, praying all keeps going well! We STILL can't believe that this is happening. I'm still in shock! I am oh so bloated, tired, having insane dreams/nightmares, and am still craving tacos/burritos and orange juice like CRAZY! So nuts to think that this little babe is already forming a skeleton and has working joints when only an inch long! ❤

The Twins 5th Birthday! - 8 weeks, tacos, oj & video!!

How did our precious little miracle twins turn 5 years old yesterday?!? Time truly does fly by WAAAY too fast. These two are so adorable, sweet, kind, hilarious, sassy, and loving. They say and do the funniest and cutest things! Since Blake is still recovering from his illness, we didn't get to do the birthday bash with our families that we had planned on out of town. But we are just glad Daddy is still here with us! Since Blake can't have any visitors, we did a small and fun party with just us 4 and my Mom. I am SOO grateful that she has been here helping! I have been just extremely exhausted. 

Even though things have been crazy, they still had an awesome day! And they were good little sports and let me take lots of pictures. I'm known as the crazy picture lady in my family. They looked so cute in their new shirts. These are the ones that we got them when we told them I'm having a baby. They got lots of fun presents from us & Papa and Grandma. And they have more on the way from other family. We got Claire a Barbie Animal Rescue, a slinky, Pete the Cat book, and a Baby Alive that you can take in the tub or pool. Cameron got a wooden block set that you can build stuff with, a Bluey family car, Pete the Cat book, and a slinky. The slinky is by far his favorite thing so far I think, ha ha. Figures. My parents got Claire a Ballerina Barbie and a momma Llama with babies. She really loves the momma Llama. Cam got a cool dino Lego set and velcro dart game from Papa and Grandma. And they also got some fun games. We all wore party hats and Grandma made them each a food allergy friendly mug cake and homemade french fries. I laughed that they each put 6 candles on their little cakes instead of 5, they both wanted one candle of every color, lol. I ate SO many fries last night. They were sooo good but I was so miserable afterwards, lol. It was so fun to have Blake come out for a bit and watch the kids open presents. He was pretty pooped afterwards though. I said, "You almost weren't here for this, sir!", and it took everything I had to not start blubbering like a baby. So glad this was a happy birthday and not a devastating one, it easily could have been! Happy Birthday to the cutest 5 year olds around, Mommy and Daddy love you soooo much!!!

I can't believe I will be 9 weeks on Saturday! This is all just so surreal. Didn't even have time to process anyping really before Blake got sick. So this all still just seems like a dream. When I had the ultrasound on Tuesday, I was sitting there thinking "Is this really MY belly?! Are we sure this isn't a video of someone else's ultrasound?!" 🤣 I really am still totally in shock. It feels like someone is playing a joke on us, ha ha. Maybe it'll seem more real when we find out the gender, idk!? I am going to do the blood work that they offer at the birthing center at 11 weeks that tests for Downs Syndrome, Trisomy, and the gender. Only $100. Our insurance won't be covering as much as it would a hospital birth, but I definitely want a different experience this time. The birthing center is beautiful, so I hope everything works out and I can go and deliver there! I have my first appt with them on the 25th. I'm so excited to find out the gender so much sooner this time around! We found out at the anatomy scan at about 20 weeks with the twins. This time we'll know in almost half the time. The birthing center said the test is like 99% accurate. It's just a simple blood test for me, nothing invasive. I couldn't do this with the twins, as the test is only for singleton pregnancies. Lately, tacos and orange juice are LIFE! I am downing and craving orange juice like you wouldn't believe. Gonna go broke! And I pretty much could eat tacos for every meal, ha ha. Oh, and homemade fries! So yummy. I am feeling really, really tired lately. Not surprising given how much is going on inside of me! I forgot how quickly these little babies develop in the first trimester. Our little peanut is now the size of a raspberry (size depends though on what article you read, ha ha). It is already developing its outer ears, has working joints (wrists, knees, shoulders, etc), and it's internal organs are forming, including its sex organs. Amazing! Cameron saw me looking at this picture on my phone and I thought he would be like, "Eww, gross!" But he said, "Aww, that's so cute!" He thought the umbilical cord was something else and asked me if it was going potty 🤣 He also asked if it was falling, and I said "Nope, it is floating in a water balloon kind of thing!" He was relieved to hear it wasn't falling and thought it was hilarious that the baby is floating around in my belly. They are both so sweet and kiss my tummy often. Cam sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to the baby the other day and then told me it was now sleeping, ha ha. These two are gonna be the sweetest and most helpful big brother and sister ever! I am going to try to upload the ultrasound video of baby, we'll see if it works...I think it did. 

Happy Mother's Day! - Flowers & A follow up ultrasound

Even when he is extremely ill, he still orders me flowers! 😭❤ Love this guy and our beautiful little family! The kids and my mom picked me out some flowers, a beautiful bunch of roses and a pretty orchid! The kids were beaming when they gave them to me the other day, cute little people!

Years ago I was broken hearted and never thought I was going to be a mother. I am so happy with how my life has turned out. I am so grateful for our miracle twins, our angel babies, and this little miracle baby! Baby checked out ok again today via ultrasound 🥳 It is measuring 8 wks 2 days, still no visible bleeds, and no Placenta Previa like with the twins. So it is likely my cervix that is causing the bleeding/spotting. Luckily it is only light spotting now and has been mostly since the scare last Tuesday night. 

Blake is getting better and better each day but has a long recovery ahead of him. So glad that angels were watching over us and that Blake and our miracle baby are still with us ❤

Week from hell! Emergency Room Date Night

This week has been a freaking nightmare!! Most stressful week of my life I'd say. Blake had not been feeling well for like 8 or 9 days. We figured it was from detoxing, as he had recently been in to see our Naturopath and got a new supplement for digestion and parasites. But he developed a high fever and refused to go in. He eventually got so weak he could barely walk and I was like "umm, no, this is ridiculous!" I had a fit and threatened him with an ambulance. So, off we went to urgent care. Cam was also not feeling well. The doctor walked in our room and said "I can see you (pointing to Cam), but you, sir (Blake), are not going to be my patient because you have blue lips and need to go to the hospital!" I looked down and sure enough he did have blue lips! What?! Within 1 minute of her saying that he collapsed backwards in his chair onto my arm, went an even worse color, and starting seizing. It was absolutely terrifying. He was in and out of consciousness and was also having trouble breathing. She yelled to the other staff to grab oxygen and tylenol. Blake was suddenly sweating so severely that they couldn't get the stickers on his chest for an EKG. A nurse was grabbing handfuls of tissues trying to keep his skin dry long enough to make them stick but he was absolutely drenched. Like, the floor was wet underneath his chair! They went through 2 or 3 sets of stickers before they got them to stick and were able to start the test. The test was showing that his heart was all over the place. He came to long enough to tell her he was having chest pain, then starting convulsing again. Claire was crying and asking what was wrong with daddy, Cameron was crying because he was also sick and thought he was going to puke, and I felt like I was in a movie, or watching myself in a dream, as I stood there patting Blake's cheeks and calling his name trying to get him to come to long enough to tell her what else was wrong. It was absolutely terrifying because there was not a thing I could do to help him. The paramedics got there just after we got him on some oxygen and they took him to the hospital. They got him stabilized on the way there and I am so thankful because I was for sure thinking I was never going to see my husband alive again. After they took him away the urgent care staff was trying to get the room cleaned up so that they could see Cameron. Claire and Cam had been sitting with some of the staff and had some stickers and I don't know what else. Claire had to go to the bathroom first so I took her really quick while a nurse still sat with Cameron. As we walked in the bathroom I called my mom to let her know about Blake and then suddenly felt a rush of something warm after I got Claire on the potty. I knew it wasn't anything good. I turned around to check myself while Claire was potting so she didn't see and saw lots of red blood on the toilet paper. I was still on the phone at this point with my mom, had just got done telling her about Blake and then said something along the lines of "Oh my gosh, I'm bleeding a lot, I need to go so I can clean myself up and get someone to take Claire." I started crying and honestly don't remember most of what I said to her on the phone, but it was not a great call for any mother to get I'm sure. So, sorry mom! 😬 We weren't sure at this point if he had covid, blood clots, pneumonia, or something else, but this was turning out to be the night from hell. I thought my husband was dying and that I was very likely losing our miracle baby on top of it. After I got myself cleaned up and assessed that I wasn't hemorrhaging, I went to go find the kids and see what I needed to do about Blake after we left. Cameron's ears, chest and throat checked out good and he just needed some more tylenol for the fever, as it was likely viral. Blake's doctor recommended that I go to the ER for an ultrasound to make sure me and baby were alright. But I was like who is going to watch my kids?!? I luckily have an awesome church family group, and sweet Emily came to sit with the kids while I went to go get checked out and see about Blake. So extremely grateful for her! Claire loved her. Their family had already had covid so she wasn't worried about being around the kids or in our home. I ended up being there for 4.5 hrs, gah. Luckily it didn't feel like it. But about an hour after I got there a nurse came to tell me that they were releasing Blake and needed his insurance information. I was absolutely floored and about completely wigged out at that point. I asked to speak to his nurse or doctor to find out why on earth they were discharging him after having convulsions, low oxygen, and chest pain only 2.5 hours earlier! She said he tested positive for covid and xrays show he had pneumonia. He now had a stable oxygen level (duh, because they had him on oxygen!) so she said that there was nothing they could do for him. I was like...umm, keep him on oxygen, monitor his chest pain?! Geeze, total morons! So, they gave him a zpak, discharged him, and his super sick self sat IN THE ER WAITING ROOM WITH ME! Can you believe they did that?! I was glad though for his company because I was really nervous for the ultrasound and was trying to prep myself for the bad news. Plus, I was happy to have him with me still on hospital grounds for an additional couple of hrs to make sure he didn't seize or have low oxygen again. Such awful care for someone so ill! Anyways, I was really expecting bad news. The ultrasound tech was a super sweet, nice guy and made friendly conversation to ease my stress. He apologized that I couldn't see the screen and he was not able to tell me anything per hospital policy, but that a doctor would read my results soon and call me back. We sat there for over an hour waiting to be called back, the ER was packed. I finally asked how much longer it was going to be because it was going on 3am and I really needed to relieve my babysitter and get my extremely ill husband home to rest. They called me back about 20 mins later and the ER doctor said everything looked great. Baby was measuring 7 wks 3 days and had a heart rate of 139!! They moved my due date to 12/19 from 12/22. I was sooo relieved!! I couldn't have handled another loss, especially this way. They didn't mention any bleeds, and said that urinary tract infections are the most common cause for bleeding during pregnancy. Apparently I had one and didn't know it. So he prescribed rest, an antibiotic, and following up with an obgyn in a few days. But I feel like the bleeding was definitely stress related. As we wheeled Blake out of there I was so very grateful that I had a sweet husband to bring home still! And that our baby was ok afterall. This has been suuuch and emotional week. The thought of losing him was the WORST feeling in the world. Our night was awful but it could have been much, much worse! I am so grateful to the awesome paramedics who got him stabilized, and that one of them called me right before I was heading to the hospital to let me know Blake was stable and doing better. That was a huuuge relief. Blake's awesome doctor, Rachael, at Urgent Care called to check on him the next day and was not happy to find out that they had discharged him so quickly and only prescribed a zpak. She had me bring him back down there at no cost and she gave him shots of both steroids and a strong antibiotic in his rear, along with an inhaler. She has called 3 times to check on him since. I am so, so grateful for her care and compassion! She said her and the other staff were very worried about our family and was so relieved to hear that the baby looked ok. Blake's oxygen has been around 94 to 96 but has gotten as low as 90 to 92. So Rachael prescribed him a different inhaler and some Zofran for his nausea. These strong antibiotics can be very hard on the stomach. Poor dude. I am sooo happy to say that after he was seen again at urgent care and received the injections, that he looks much better. He is still very weak and very sick, but he is improving so that's great. He has a long recovery ahead of him but I am just so happy he is still with us! I called yesterday to get Cam's covid test results and the lady who answered knew who I was and asked all about Blake, me, and Cam. She was so relieved to hear he was alright and that we hadn't lost the baby. Apparently we have been the talk of urgent care, ha ha. She told me that I am the calmest mother and wife she has ever seen in an emergency situation. She said I was calm, quiet, and so loving towards my kids while calming them. I wanted to cry when she said that because I was utterly terrified on the inside while everything was going on, but I didn't feel the need to freak out and scare my small children more so than they already were. She said more women need to take lessons from me on how to behave. I laughed when she said that but I was thinking that I don't really blame the ones who do completely lose it, ha ha. You never really know how you're going to react in situations like that until it is happening. I did want to yell "Oh my gosh, what is happening?!? He is shaking and sweating like crazy and breathing weird! I think he's dying!! Help him!" Apparently they get some outrageous behavior at urgent care or something? Anyways, my bleeding has lessened a lot and is mostly just spotting now. It isn't constant and only happens if I do too much, so I have been taking it easy. Dr Conway from the fertility center said she wants me on Pelvic Rest until I'm seen at the obgyns office and to take it easy. When I found out what that means I laughed, because the likelihood of Blake and I doing any funny business anytime soon is very unlikely 🤣 So grateful for my sweet mom and sister who dropped everything and drove through the night to get to us!! They are cleaning my house, doing my laundry, taking care of the kids and Blake, cooking, and letting me nap! I have been suffering from shock and exhaustion from the horror of it all, and from lack of sleep of course. I got a good nap yesterday and slept better last night than any night yet, so I feel more human today. My mom thinks it'll take me a few more days at least to get over the shock of everything. I finally was rested enough today that I could cry about everything, so that helped a lot. Cameron hasn't said too much about things, but poor Claire is very upset about what happened. She was telling my mom about it a couple days ago. Poor little girl was even trying to "help them fix Daddy." They had to take them both out of the room because she kept getting in their way. I hope that Blake recovers quickly and doesn't have any further complications, and we are crossing our fingers that baby checks out good still this coming week! Oh, and a quick Public Service Announcement...listen to your wife and go to the doctor if you have a high fever for more than a few days!! Don't almost let yourself die at home in bed!! Thank you. His doctor said he is very lucky to be here and she's glad we weren't even 20 mins longer or else things would have very likely ended badly. Especially if he refused to go in at all. She said he very well could have passed away at home that evening. Thanks SO MUCH to my mom and sister for coming and helping, and to my in-laws for offering!

A big thumbs down for our date night in the ER!!!